


Fourteen Days and Counting

by professortennant



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angels, Angst, Cas-centric, Destiel - Freeform, M/M, Post Ep 810, Post Torn And Frayed, canon AU
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-02-02
Updated: 2013-02-02
Packaged: 2017-11-27 23:38:14
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,755
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/667769
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/professortennant/pseuds/professortennant
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Castiel wakes up in Naomi's room with the knowledge that Dean and Sam haven't prayed or thought about him since Samandriel. Naomi offers him Heaven again and Castiel struggles to find his place in the world--in Heaven or with the Winchesters. Cas-centric with eventual Destiel.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fourteen Days and Counting

**Author's Note:**

> This was born out of my deep love for Castiel and my pervasive case of insomnia. It will be heavy angst and heavy wump. I will be posting here as well as on my Tumblr (www.professortennant.tumblr.com). There will be references to memory loss, so be aware of that.

Castiel stuttered awake, gasping for air, eyes wide and frantic, searching the blindingly white room for any sign of the Winchesters. His head was throbbing painfully and his hands felt strangely heavy.

He glanced down at his hands and swallowed hard when he saw them covered in red. Blood. Samandriel's blood. He gave a hoarse cry and began to hurriedly wipe and swipe his hands on his already dirty trench coat, desperate to get the reminder of his actions off his skin.

He closed his eyes against the burn of tears and panic. He had killed. Again. He had watched the Grace of his brother--his younger, innocent brother--fizzle out of his vessel. Castiel remembered the lack of a wing burn on the pavement or car. Samandriel wasn't even old enough to have mature wings, yet. 

Castiel felt the bile rise in his throat as he stumbled around the too-clean room blindly, looking for a way out. He tried to unfurl his wings but found them bound. Even his Grace was restricted, too tight and contained in Jimmy's body. Whatever was keeping him in this room was powerful magic.

He needed to get out, he needed to warn Dean and Sam. The angels were in disarray again, something was wrong with Heaven. He needed to get to them, needed to confess what he'd done, explain...

A rush of air and the flap of wings alerted him to another angel's presence in the room. He whirled around, mouth open and ready to demand answers, to spew questions when he saw who had joined him.

Naomi. 

She looked as impeccable as ever, not a hair out of place, and Castiel begrudgingly thought she looked beautiful in her power. 

"Let me go. I've done what you wanted, haven't I? I've killed for you."

Naomi tsked and took her seat behind the wide desk, gesturing for Castiel to take a seat.

"Calm yourself and your melodramatics, Castiel. I see your time on Earth has made you prone to humanity's histrionics." She narrowed her eyes as Castiel made no move to take the chair in front of her. "Sit." 

Castiel merely crossed his arms, defiant. Naomi smiled.

"To tell you the truth, I'd be upset if you had listened. Glad to see the fight's still in you. Now, are you going to sit in petulant silence or do you want to listen?"

Hot anger tempered with violent grief and self-hatred flared low in Castiel's belly. Who was she to demand from Castiel? Hadn't he done enough on Heaven's orders?

He stalked towards the chair, shoving it onto its side so it clattered to the floor. His trench coat whirled around him in his pace and he felt the force of every injustice upon him rise up. 

"Listen? You don't care if I listen, Naomi. You care that I obey, you care that I perform for you, whether I want to or not. You made me," he heaved in a deep breath, "You made me kill Samandriel for you."

Naomi cut in, "Not for me, Castiel, for Heaven. He had compromised himself, he had compromised Heaven, compromised us."

Castiel was shaking his head, "No. He had already given up the information. Why kill him after the fact? Why not take him in, heal him? Learn precisely what he told Crowley?"

Naomi smiled without warmth. "You truly do have too much heart, Castiel." She leaned forward, steepling her fingers resting her chin on them. "What do you know of Crowley's torture methods? His results?"

Castiel tilted his head, "What does that have to do with anything?"

Naomi spoke quickly, glad to see that she had his attention. "Crowley turned off Samandriel's communication with Heaven, Castiel. He cracked and pounded at Samandriel's Grace until he split wide open for him, bared his secrets. He found whatever God put in our heads that made us, well, us. Crowley found our programming if you will--"

Castiel interrupted, "We aren't robots, we aren't programmed."

Naomi raised an eyebrow, genuinely amused. "Oh? And yet I believe a few short years ago, you were accusing Heaven of that very thing. Not questioning our orders, not questioning the bigger picture. How times have changed, my brother."

Castiel look appropriately abashed. Naomi continued.

"Yes, Samandriel told Crowley, willingly or not, how to hurt us most, how to change our operation methods. But what if that wasn't all he had done Castiel?"

Castiel tilted his head in question. "What do you mean?"

"What if Crowley changed Samandriel? What if Crowley was experimenting with his newfound ability to manipulate the way angels think and act? What if--"

"--what if Samandriel was compromised. I see, now. I would have brought him to Heaven, a potential sleeper agent for Crowley." Castiel swallowed hard, thinking. 

"Precisely. I was protecting Heaven, Castiel. I was protecting what little there is left anyway." 

Naomi got up from her desk and came to stand in front of Castiel. "Do you see now, Castiel? You are integral to Heaven. Integral to me and your family." 

She reached out a long, pale finger, ready to trail lovingly down the angel's face. Castiel glared and batted the hand away.

"You are not my family, Naomi. Heaven has rejected me and my brothers have spurned me. The Winchesters are my family." He puffed his chest out, proud of his small, broken family that he had found all on his own.

"I understand your motives, Naomi, at least those that you have explained to me. But I won't be used to hurt them or to gather information from them, so leave me alone. Keep your business in Heaven and leave me out of it. I'm out."

He frowned angrily at Naomi's smug face. "Now remove the wards from this room and let me go back to them. Now." He lowered his voice on the last word, growling.

Naomi shook her head sadly. "You don't remember do you?"

"Remember what?"

She licked her lips and paused, smoothing the front of her pressed business suit before stepping forward one more time, keeping her voice low and intimate, as if sharing a secret. Perhaps she was but Castiel felt wary. 

"Castiel, how long do you think you've been in this room?"

He shot her an unreadable look, exasperated and tired. All he wanted to do was return to Dean and Sam and sit in the Impala, quiet and listening to the rumble of the engine. His heart felt heavy and his head hurt with angel and demon wars and tactics. He wanted home. He wanted Dean and Sam.

He answered tiredly, "I don't know, Naomi. A few hours? However long it's taken you to remove Samandriel from my arms and however long it took me to wake up."

Naomi's eyes widened before shaking her head slowly. "Castiel, you've been here three days."

Castiel felt his stomach drop, his mind racing, desperate to recover the missing time. 

"No, that can't be. I--" He looked at Naomi, confused. "What happened?"

"You came back with Samandriel, yes. But you almost immediately went back to the Winchesters. They had angel sigils on their room, you were immediately banished back here. Ramiel mended your wings, that is why they are bound. The sigils were archaic and they scorched your wings."

Castiel unconsciously rolled his shoulders and felt that the weight on his wings--the binding--was not magical at all as he had originally thought. Instead, he could feel Ramiel's medical Grace wrapped around them, soothing and healing. 

"But why would they place sigils on their room? They have no reason to fear the angels anymore." His voice was quiet, confused.

Naomi lowered her eyes and placed a comforting hand on his shoulder. Castiel allowed the touch.

"I don't think they were warding against angels, Castiel. I think," she paused and he looked up, searching her face for any hint of insincerity. "I think they were warding against you."

Castiel stumbled back, the memories of Kryptonite and Superman and going to the dark side and those eyes looking at him with wounded betrayal and a rift in their relationship tearing them apart.

"Dean would never...He's not afraid of me. He wouldn't..." 

Naomi spoke quietly, firmly. "Castiel, this is what we were trying to shield you from all these years. Eventually, Dean Winchester would remember what you are. You are not human, Castiel. You are supernatural, other worldly and you were never meant to be a part of his world. You belong here, Heaven. You belong with your real family."

Castiel looked up desperately, shaking his head. "No, Dean is my family. Sam is my family. They are merely confused, scared. I must have been a sight to see--I felt blood coming out of my eye and Samandriel was still heavy in my arms. You'll see, they were merely concerned."

Naomi nodded sagely. "Then you can go to them Castiel, you are not bound here. The moment they pray to you, either one of them, you may go to them." 

She waved her hand and a door appeared, slightly off-white and Cas could see the outline of light beyond the door.

"In the meantime, patrol Heaven. Walk around, visit your favorite resting grounds. Heal your wings and give your Grace a recharge, so to speak. You aren't a prisoner here, and I think you'll find things in Heaven have calmed rather significantly." She shot him a wry grin. "You'll find mass extermination is quite the wake-up call."

Castiel hung his head in shame. She tilted his head up with a gentle finger, "You have more than repented, Castiel. You set us back on course and though your methods are regrettable, we do not begrudge you them. Forgiveness is one of our best traits, right?"

Castiel nodded numbly, eyeing the door, wings twitching restlessly. He had missed Heaven, no matter what he said. He loved humans and humanity and he loved the parks and the crunchy green grass and even the bees. But he missed the warmth of Heaven's realm.

Naomi followed Castiel's gaze and smiled, stepping aside and sweeping her arm in a grand gesture, whispering in his ear, "Welcome home, Castiel."

For the first time in a long time, Castiel smiled and made quick strides toward the door, the gateway to Heaven. It wouldn't hurt to spend a few hours while he waited for Dean or Sam's prayer. He wouldn't be waiting long.

He hoped.

Naomi stood and watched the young angel disappear into Heaven's light.

"Welcome home, indeed."


End file.
